[...] I found it on digg earlier. Even though the bands may be the only decent thing about it that doesn’t change the fact that most of them are terrible. [...]

[...] How MySpace Is Destroying Language After my previous posts on language where several commenters pointed out that language is an evolving thing and that I don’t get it and I retored that it’s my blog and I’ll be a curmudgeon if I want to (Ed Note: not exactly an intellectual conversation), digg.com linked to an unscientific analysis of how MySpace is a failure of humanity. My favorite part: MySpace has created a safe haven for a scary phenomenon. It fosters a snowballing language deterioration led by the youth. New dialects and minimalist communication conventions appear among friend groups. While I know there‚Äôs no ‚Äòone American dialect‚Äô and I can‚Äôt force my opinions on what communication is, I do know that the development of minimalist text message-like language on the web is about five steps back from the middle ages. A man after my own heart. Published Sunday, April 23, 2006 10:56 AM by johnmont Filed Under: Amusement [...]

[...] read more    [...]

[...] A Scientific Study of Why MySpace Sucks – This guy used Google to conduct a study of the plague that is MySpace, here is probably my favorite portion. [...]

[...] I think everyone should read this post about myspace…I agree completely with what a waste of time it is…and yet…I habitually check it all the time…its gotta be one of those subliminal things! [...]

[...] Link To Article Share and Enjoy:These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages. [...]

[...]  Read the rest here.  [...]

[...] Tagging Air Force One RIAA sues family that doesn’t own a PC A Scientific Approach to Myspace’s Failure Congress Readies broad new digital copyright bill Great News Network What’s behind mysterious booms? Working at Microsoft, the Inside Scoop Yahoo! Allegedly Helps Beijing Arrest a Third Reporter New Internet Regulation Proposed Apple blocking MySpace in retail stores Air force One Subject to Internet Hoax [...]

[...] The “science” of MySpace [...]

[...] video about following the social properties of the top comedians and their myspace figures should make for a funny video. It doesn’t:Two MillionAdd to My Profile | More Videos [...]

uterly brilliant.
I think, time permiting, your next little experiment should be concerning facebook dot com. Facebook is the retarded college student equivalent of MySpace.

ptolomey added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 8:42 am

I think the fact that Myspace is home to such a large proportion of idiots is a good thing. They’re all contained in one place, and aren’t causing damage anywhere else. Thankfully, nobody can force me to view any part of Myspace. :-D

Now all we need to do is figure out a way to blow the whole package up…;-)

Philip Withnall added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 9:12 am

The thing with myspace is the advertising potential to millions of kids around the world and guess what? it is free!

The problem i have with it is the fact that people are allowed to customise it with unreadable backgrounds malformed html and generally seem to think it is a good idea to go back in time in terms of web programming principles – marques etc… i dont want to go there!

A very amusing post though.

Facebook is so much better than myspace purely because it is simple, well designed and doesnt allow some BO moster who is 15 years old to mutilate the appearance of their profiles!

Also why with myspace do i get bombared with this ‘emo’ music when i explicitly said i dont want to hear anyones music?!

whoreman added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 9:13 am

Excellent article. And speaking of facebook, a new trend I see with some of my friends is them migrating to facebook and saying its so much better. Myspace=Facebook=crap. I just dont see the enjoyment in looking at 100’s of terribly designed pages about people that I dont care about. Believe it or not, people made new friends before this stupid craze came about.

rob added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 9:24 am

Absolutely brilliant, funny yet so true…

Dean added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 9:57 am

Wow…just….just wow.

Also, thank you for giving me excellent backing to my explanations of why myspace sucks.

I thnk your next little google-experiemnt-thing should involve vampirefreaks.com. It’s worse than myspace, but not by much.

stfu goth freaks added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 10:36 am

I would love to shake your hand. Bravo. =D

Anonymous added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 11:17 am

We’ve had this in Sweden for well over 7 years, it’s called lunarstorm(.se) and consists of what we call fjortisar (pun on the word fourteen (fjorton)) and elderly men trying to lure them into the sack.

Myspace is just the US introduction to teens having a place online where they can exchange webcam stripteases for financial favours, as paying the nude teen’s phone bill or providing him/her with the poison of their choice.

It’s decadence, you gotta ¬ªluv¬ª it.

Philip added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 1:39 pm

I can’t wait til some idiot leaves a comment that says:

“MySpAcE iS a GoOd SiTe. YoU’rE jUsT sOmE lOsEr WiTh No LiFe.”

Someone probably already left a comment like that, though.

Walter E. Lilly added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 4:34 pm

Kinda hard to think of this as a reputible article when your domain name is moneydick.com, isn’t it?

anonymous added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 5:15 pm

I think this little experiment was awesome! I have to admitt though that I do have a myspace account, but I only use it to keep in touch with cousins that live very far away. And about the “goth” thing, I bet there’s a lot more out there, but some of us who you’d consider “goth” don’t like to label ourselves, kinda defeats the purpose of being different. And to say something in response to all the Facebook comments, I think facebook is a good website, its only open to those people who attend college, its simple, and if you need to find someone in your class for something its easy to do.

But anyways, Kudos, good job on this experiment!

Enigma added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 6:20 pm

Yes, please do another one of these on facebook. I’ve been saying for years that it’s a useless cesspool of social disorders – I think you could well prove it.

slickdude added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 8:37 pm

I don’t know if I could do one for facebook.com because it’s so utilitarian. Hell, it probably validates (w3c.org) It’s evil in many of the same ways, but I would just be repeating myself. It’s also harder to get any solid facts about because of its closed nature. Myspace is massive and floppy like an elephant with elephantitus. But it’s easier to take it’s blood pressure. I’m going to stop writing now.

moneydick added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 9:27 pm

I very much enjoyed your article on this topic. It does make me wish I had not got into the facebook craze. I am lucky enough to never have got onto the myspace yet, and after this i definately will not. I wich there were restrictions to what could be done, that is why I like facebook somewhat. I am able to find someone in a class the day before an exam and find out what I need to know. Helps me out as a slacker. I know thats not good, but what can you do huh. My girlfriend has even discontinued herself from using the facebook for almost all of the reasons you have posted about myspace… its funny that she told me all this about 3 days before I read this article. Well thank you very much for verbalizing the disgust of myspace. It has finally been done, and in quite the fashion.

E added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 10:50 pm

I think the good thing about Mypace is the way that it gives people that might not otherwise be able to communicate a relatively safe way to do so. For example One of our Brave Troops in a forieghn land communicating with their spouses or other loved ones.

The bad thing about Myspace besides the ones that are listed in This essay. The sight contributes to a Huge ammount of Self Absorbtion that I see many people are afflicted with on Myspace. The site encourages the thought by many that participate in the site that the only person in the world is them and that the earth revolves around only them.

Chuck added these pithy words on Apr 23 06 at 11:48 pm

First of all, I enjoyed the whole presentation. The various facts and stats were very interesting. However, I do have a few opinions for all the “myspace bashers” out there. If you don’t like it, don’t use it. Why waste your time bitching about something that other people do?
Also, i understand a lot of people can’t spell. The whole point of myspace is to communicate with others. So what if the words are spelled wrong. It doesn’t really matter how people type or phrase things, as long as you understand. That is the whole point, right? As for the “goth” people. WHO CARES. That part of the article was just plain ignorant. There are plenty other social groups to pick from, why you picked goths, I have no idea.
The internet is not the center of the universe. All you people that excessively complain and worry about myspace, make it seem that it has more of an impact on this planet that it really does. GIVE IT A REST! Yes, I have an account. Yes, I log on everyday. I don’t give a rat’s ass what anyone says about it. I will expect negative and cheap responses to this comment, but they will only prove my point. So long and goodnight.

Rick added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 12:04 am

I really planned on doing a scientific inquiry into the reproductive strategies of humans using myspace. I am really glad that you noticed the self advertisement aspect of the myspace community. People advertise images of themselves in sexual context as a means to meet potential reproductive mates, or something on that note. Anyhow, good job. I personally am a user of myspace, but I use it to keep in contact with personal friends who I have a hard time contacting via telephone.

Lane added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 2:06 am

I have a myspace account that I use for my “band”…I’m a solo artist, literally, and it seemed like a good way to get my music out, and to advertise my site. The only non-musical friends on my list are people that I know from other places on the web. I posted about the “Spam Central” nature of the place on one of my message boards, and I may very well link to this in the blog I maintain (sometimes) on my site.

Robert the Bard added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:13 am

There is nothing “scientific” here. These are a bunch of searches and opinions of the site, and the idea that these indicate that Myspace has somehow “failed” is rediculous.

You say “These highly scientific searches were conducted with Google using…” Searches are done by using a program to analyze a database and return results. Nothing “scientific” occurs during a search. I think you said that just to add pseudointellectual jargon to act as if you did some sort of study, and hide the fact that this is actually just a long flame post that could be summarized as the cliche “emo sucks.”

To do a scientific study, you must first have a hypothesis, and then find a way to test it. The test should include a control group as well as an experimental group, and the test should show a difference between the groups that supports the hypothesis. You never had a hypothesis. You had an opinion, “Myspace failed.” You did nothing to test this opinion, and in fact nothing here has anything to do with that opinion. For example: You never said what a “failure” of Myspace actually is, and nothing here seems to indicate that myspace actually failed.

You presented evidence supports the claim that words like “I’m going to kill myself” can be found in many places on Myspace, which may support the claim that many people on myspace want to kill themselves, but it does not come close to proving it. The people who used the phrase could not really want to kill themselves, could be joking, or could be quoting someone else. After all, this flame would get a be listed in a search for “I’m going to kill myself.” If even a small fraction of the 9620 listings were people who were actually going to kill themselves, it would be national news. That many people dying cannot go unnoticed.

You presented evidence that supports the claim that many misspelled words can be found at Myspace. You claim that this indicates that many people who use myspace are illiterate. This conclusion is so far fetched that I can only assume that in your gigantic flame you wanted to say that people on Myspace are illiterate to go along with your “emo sucks” idea, and that this was the only way you could think of to do it. “Alot” is an acceptable way to spell “a lot,” so that is not even a misspelling. “Luv” and “wut up” are accepted internet speak. “Krazy” is internet speak, meant to add emphasis to “crazy.” “Wierd” and “thier” are the only misspellings you listed, but just because someone does not type in a word correctly does not mean that they don’t know how to spell it, and it definitely doesn’t mean that they are illiterate. In fact, I think it is evidence that they are actually literate. “Weird” and “Their” are prety complicated words, learned much after simpler words such as “Cat” and “Run.” That someone knows to use “Their” instead of “There” is evidence that they have learned advanced English syntax. The idea that an internet site that has millions of users who post millions of messages every day is full of people who are illiterate is absolutely rediculous. Just going to the first “illiterate” blog you list, “Lookin Like A Star…” shows someone who is clearly not only literate but effective at communicating well. He introduces himself as “Im 6′4 black,white,and rican and as you can see ya boi v is sexy so I dont really need to tell you bout my looks. …” in a very clear, well written sentence, which may not be acceptable for an essay(using the internet speak abbreviation “bout” for “about”) but is definitely more than acceptable for an internet introduction.

The rest of your “scientific evidence” could be dealt with the same way, but I am tired of typing, so I will deal with the rest of your sections in summary:

Goths: how does finding the word “goth” mean that an article is by someone who is a goth? This flame contains the word “goth.” What’s wrong with someone who calls themself or looks goth? How does that indicate some sort of “failure?”

Originality: Your search for cliches only returned a couple hundred thousand out of 50 million profiles, which each contain many pages. I bet there are more people than that who use cliches on myspace. As long as cliches are used correctly, or not used too often, they are perfectly acceptable. How does this indicate some sort of “failure?”

Good and Evil: This section is so senseless I don’t even know what to say about it.

Parent Hating: This is part of our culture, that many children dislike their parents. Because Myspace is a place where they express themselves, they express how they feel about their parents. Not saying how they feel would be suppression, something that can be unhealthy. I would call this evidence for the SUCCESS of Myspace.

Ads: How are the ads on Myspace different from the ones on the rest of the internet? The ads you have shown actually look prety small and not very annoying compared to a lot of gigantic flashing ads that cover the screen that I’ve seen. This has nothing to do with “failure” of anything.

Perverts: This is already well known, and you have provided nothing to further the fight against perverts finding children to rape online. This is also something that is not just true of Myspace, but the rest of the internet. The nature of myspace has just made it a target for perverts.

Several comments to your flame:
“uterly brilliant.”
“Fine work you‚Äôve done here”
“Excellent article.”
“Absolutely brilliant”
“You are my hero.”
“I agree”
“Great information!”

At least one person said:
“HHHmmm‚Ķ I didnt know google searches where ‚Äúhighly scientific‚Äù”
but then went on to say:
“Nice work!!!”

I find this very disturbing, as it seems to indicate that at least the first few people read and cared to comment on your flame thought it really meant something, and it appears that this is how it has spread around the internet.

I actually don’t like Myspace. I think the page template that they have does not allow someone to create much more than an annoying, blinking, sounding, unlegible page with a scroll bar that goes off in all directions and a background image that does not allow you to read anything.

Your “article” which is actually an enormus flame, was not done with any intention of doing a study, and has nothing to do with science. If someone actually believes the utterly meaningless things presented in this flame, it is extremely misleading.

However, I think this flame is very well suited for an uncyclopedia.com article. I think that if you copied it word for word, and especially if you included the pictures(with permission of the author of corse, don’t plagiarize) it would be a very good candidate for a featured article.

CatastrophicToad@gmail.com

Someone added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:28 am

I don’t like the idea of Armerican police knowing anything about me, especially since I live on the other side of the world, that’s why nothing on my blog has my name or address on it, even the hotmail account I use can’t be traced to me. Ok I have photos, but so far it’s hard to scan in one photo and return similar ones. I don’t know how people are so dumb as to say stuff that if it wasn’t published then probably wouldn’t cause so many problems.
Anyway just reading up and Seventh Squire wrote “If the majority of our youths understood English as a first language, perhaps Myspace would be a much better site. But alas, it seems as though America?Äôs youth is forever descending into a world where written communication skills are optional” I know you probably didn’t mean it like this, but dude, America ain’t the only country on the planet, and you’re mostly decended, pretty recently too, from people who’s first language wasn’t English, and English itself is a mish-mash of other languages. Languages evolve too.

I don't think so added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:44 am

I think that if you were to do another of these deals, like on say, facebook, you should collaborate with a myspace hating company. That would make it so that so many people couldn’t complain about it being such an “unscientific” study.

Anonymous added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:41 am

when will you do a research about Friendster?

Grae added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:32 am

Evolution has always be a part of nature. Sadly, evolution has taken on a digital format. People’s online existences are as vacuous and unispired as their real lives. Granted, it is steaming pool of cow shit, but this only reflects the general population of humans anyway. In other words, it is no surpise. For something a little disturbing only because of how so very real it is (drumroll please) mydeathspace! Yes, we can now visit the pages of people whom have expired. The part that is confusing (but, again, no surprising) is that people leave comments for dead people – like it is a virtual graveyard andf you’re laying roses (a comment) on their grave (page). Sometimes, people even shit on the deceased. Now that’s American.

http://www.mydeathspace.com/deaths.aspx

Peter The Great added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:49 am

First off, I’ve already seen several comments that call into question the validity of this “scientific study.” I don’t suppose that any of you though, for one minute, that it might have been called scientific in a sarcastic tone? That maybe, just possibly, he was writing it as such to bring out the few people that would completely take it the wrong way. It’s a very well written article, with some interesting stats. As a minimalist myspace user, I’ve seen first hand what he is talkin about. Both sides of it. I have several friends in bands that have used myspace to get their music out there, and I have several friends that have the seizure inducing pages. To each their own. As for the language barrier, “alot” is not an acceptable “spelling” of “a lot.” One word does not equal two in this case. There isn’t a full blown internet language yet, just a shorthand version of bastardized english that people have come to understand over the years. It is by no means perfect, and I personally hope that it eventually fixes itself, otherwise, I forsee a future where the NY Times #1 bestseller is written in nothing more than 13375p34k, (leetspeak for those of you that aren’t fluent in it.)

DJ

dirtyJ added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:30 am

I suggest that people start typing in “drawls”.

Chris added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:59 am

The Facebook = MySpace argument is a very valid one when concerning the lack of physical social interaction. Yes there are hundreds of thousands of people you don’t know on there, but most people who have an account aren’t looking to find and make friends of people they don’t know. Facebook is for college friends to keep in touch after they part from each other. Personally, I have been to four different schools throughout my college career, and find Facebook very helpful in contacting and catching up with old friends. Yes I know that e-mail, and a simple phone call or face-to-face visit can do the same, but to learn about the daily goings on of a friend just by the click of a button is a lot more simple than driving 400 miles.

As for Myspace, I will never make a profile or even enter the domain. I feel as if the sheer entrance of my mind into the site will cause permanent blindness and mental retardation. MySpace is the cause of bushy hair and popped collars on CHILDREN ages 7-18, as well as their insubordinate attitudes toward authority, elders and pretty much people who are bigger than they who could kick the ever-loving shit out of them.

It’s an entire generation of little cesspool spawned Satan’s running around giving me smart-ass remarks about how cool their “style” is, and how uncool I am for not taking part in it. Little do they know, I am immune to their little plan of world domination, and will react accordingly.

J.R. added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 7:16 am

Wow… and to think you could have actually done something that would help people with your time, and your love for searching for things on Google. Very well written, but, I mean really, what was the point of that entire article? So what if myspace is a cesspool of garbage on the internet. The internet is 10% actual information, what the other 90% is porno, and other vulgar material. I guess my point is, why not do research on something that actually is important?

Hybrid added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 7:30 am

Great article and observations. It’s called, “dumbing of America”.

It’s sad how bad children, or better yet, the children of our nation can’t read or spell correctly.

and I’m talking about 40 year olds!!!!

Joel added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 7:58 am

I’m Rick James Bitch

j added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 8:10 am

Pure comical genius, too bad the audience for the most part failed their IQ tests. I applaud your “scientific research” and thank you for making me laugh. By reading half the comments alone, I notice that most people do not know how to take things with a grain of salt, it’s pretty sad. Anyway, keep up the good work and I concur, myspace does suck, even though I have an account.

Dume Bass added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 8:31 am

You are my hero.

Josh Jordan added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 8:44 am

Bravo Bravo, i never usually bother to read long web pages like this but it sounded like a good read. I see people at college and all dinner they just update their myspace profile its seriously sad, i have never even attempted to make a profile i think it sucks too much

John added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 8:54 am

MySpace is an inverse black hole (a white head?), spewing forth all the universe’s waste with no end in sight. And Rupert Murdoch owns it. Go figure.

Trevor added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 9:13 am

Well i see some very interesting numbers here…
However I must disagree with you that “My space” sucks or is a waste of time…
I found the love of my life on there due to Adding my best friend as a “My space” friends…
I do concur that there are a lot of High school folks on there. and that explains about 85 % of your little artical.
But you can not disregaurd the smart people on there!
Thanks for the artical like i said nice numbers! You must have a lot of free time to do stuff like this!
Good luck to you!
P.S. Friends list if you keep it limited to people you accully know… My space is a great place!

Pril added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 10:31 am

Re: Why complain about myspace instead of just not using it?

The reason is that if you know a decent number of internet-savvy people, there’s pretty high odds that one of them will go around and try to convince you and every mutual friend to get on myspace.

And if you refuse, they persist until you stop talking to them.

Radlith added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 10:56 am

good call on the Two Gallants. great band.

Kellen added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 11:22 am

I found this brilliant and very entertaining, not to mention very true. I’m a Myspace user (and I have been since 2004), and I hate it when angsty teens say they hate their parents. Most of them are emo and get everything they own from guess who? Their parents! Also, a great majority of “goths” on Myspace are nothing more than misled youths that shop at Hot Topic (thus making them mall-goths).

Myspace does have its positive sides such as connecting to old friends and relatives (as well as keeping in touch with bands). However, it’s mostly the internet’s biggest steaming pile of fly-infested fecal matter.

Skryknow added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 11:38 am

wow get a life. stop wasting your time writing up some stupid web page about how you hate myspace? we get it you hate mayspace? GET OVER IT. your like 1 in 72 million.

… and you think the people on myspace don’t have lives?

kathryn added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 12:02 pm

I am so very glad to have read this. It made my day. I do use Myspace and I think its a complete waste of time, the people on there are fake, and most of them are asshats. So I salute you and I will not post this as a bulletin. I will however take it to school and show all my friends. Because I think it is that great.

Cassidy added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 12:13 pm

It’s easy to make fun of myspace itself and ALL the people using it because there is a pourcentage of them that are stupid. With the many people on myspace, it’s like a sample of the real population. You’d be surprise to see that there are a lot of them that share a lot with you. Ads you can find them on every site as well as typing mistake, I know “luv” is not one of them, but all the other three are. The thing that supports my keyboard falls all the time with my keyboard, the most affected key by that is my space bar. Then every one can interchange 2 letters in a word while typing. It’s one thing you write and you never look at again. I think people who doesn’t want to use a service because every one trendy owns a myspace are more stupid than the people on myspace.

Sidney added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 12:41 pm

Additional anti-MySpace comment by a MySpace user.

Mike added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 1:07 pm

Congrats to the writer of this page. I have many friends who are obsessed with myspace. And to the people who say that writing up this page was a waste of time, I’m willing to bet it has taken only a quarter of the time that you have spent aimlessly on myspace, not only adding different pictures but searching different people’s profiles that you have never even met, and will probably never meet. And to add to that, most myspace users log on every day for at least half an hour, some don’t even log off, for fear of missing a bulletin telling you that you will die within five minutes if you don’t re-post it. All the author of this webpage did was prove a point he was interested in INSTEAD of going on to myspace all day waiting for someone to send you a comment stating some stupid inside joke that will make you look “cool” to all your friends that you know one more person than they do.

Claudia added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 1:13 pm

some guy, were you trying to make a point there? cos you kinda rambled… a lot.
you can tell any addicted myspace user by the distinct lack of a train of thought, or mind of their own

i WiSh My PaReNtS wErE dEaD, tHeN i CoUlD pAiNt EvErYtHiNg BlAcK aNd SlEeP iN a CoFfIn!

sam (again) added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 1:32 pm

Well, the cliche is exactly as it says..”opinions are like assholes…everyone has one.”

David added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 1:53 pm

Wow you really went above and beyond to prove that Myspace sucks. You need to find a better use for your time. Perhaps you should look into creating your own myspace type page instead of bitching about the one that is allready there. Suck it.

John added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 2:02 pm

Nice work, you definately got MySpace pegged. Congrats. But I don’t know if having a bunch of the world’s dumbest on one site is such a bad idea. I think I like the retards. If it weren’t for them, who else could we make fun of? At least I know that, when I have a bad day, I can go to a site and find a vast majority of idiots that I can poke fun of :)

Heather added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 2:44 pm

racist

brokevagina added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:12 pm

Never mind I reread the article and I think you make some realy good points. I guess I should have read the whole thing before making my previous post. Ill probably take my myspace down and tell my friends to go join vampirefreaks.com which is way cooler. I still think you need to get a friggin life but thats what vampires.com is for. So I invite you, moneydick, and all you other losers to join vampirefreaks.com with me.

Jessie added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:19 pm

Im glad to see everyone has such a strong opinion on my article, be it positive or negative. I wrote this article with a hint of sarcasm (hense the scientific research) but also with the intent of exposing myspace for what it really is, a haven for illiterate, self-absorbed, superficial, illegal alien myspacers who keep taking over my myspace groups. Friggin mexicans are taking all our (americans) myspace pages and its starting to piss me off!
[This comment was not written by the author of this article. I decided to leave it so that people can see this.]

moneydick added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:27 pm

erm, Jessie, I think you should spend a bit more time on myspace and see what it really is. Go through other peoples pages and profiles. Tell me if you can actually READ anything on there without your eyes bleeding. Come back in 30 seconds if you don’t have epilepsy.

Know nothing about myspace? I used to use it. It’s a peice of shit now.

Atleast you have alright grammar and spelling.

“yo u cen keep on hatn n takn ma komments down but ima jus keep puttn bck izzon cuz yall juz haterz! myspizace is da shyt n if yall cent handel it den u cen juz go 2 hel lyke all da oter myspace hatas. i gots mad myspaces n ima keeps chkn em lyke erday n ima take allyall off my frenz list so juz keeps hatn!”

Classic example.

Duranix added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:34 pm

“hmm” what point are you trying to make. So what if he is a goth that shouldnt take away from his message of how stereotypes have harmed our society in so many ways. It is unfair to judge people based on their appearance and if you are to judge people (which you probably shouldnt) then judge a person as an indivudal dont judge them by association to any group of people, thats just not fair. And if you start to judge people soley on their appearance thats just plain ignorance. Also to insult him by calling him a goth is unwaranted and immature, it is such a black person thing to do. I didnt come to insult you because your black but go back to your hood with your bucket of fried chicken and listen to your stupid mind dumbing rap music, if you can even call it music!

tom added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:39 pm

Hmm.

So it’s “ok” for you to call him black, but he can’t call you a goth?

MYSPACE ALERT!

Duranix added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:45 pm

Duranix- since when did black become an insult?

mindful observer added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:49 pm

It became an insult when he said:

“I didnt come to insult you because your black but go back to your hood with your bucket of fried chicken and listen to your stupid mind dumbing rap music, if you can even call it music!”

Duranix added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:53 pm

Haha, amazing. This has changed me and my views on myspace. eek. I might quit now. :P

Omta added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:54 pm

duranix- alright I was just curious

mindful observer added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 3:56 pm

I used to get very frustrated with people who couldn’t spell. Then I figured the more people that can’t spell, the better for me. I’ll have access to jobs they never will.

There is a difference between using net shorthand (see I just did it myself, not so bad was it? :-) oops an emo and being illiterate. One achieves communication faster, the other has the advantage I mentioned above.

So all in all thanks for the chuckle and here’s to illiteracy.

ps I particularly enjoyed the replies explaning how your article was unscientific. lolzors. Learn to _read_ O wait they won’t be able to beat me to get a job either.

Paul added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:03 pm

first off ill admit to having a myspace and frequenting it on occasion. but the thing that bugs me most about myspace is all the crap people put on it, maybe i just need a faster computer with speakers that can handle three songs running concurrently and can handle twice as many videos and thrre times as many pictures.

its me added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:04 pm

Yeah, I know, I would rather have them all quarantined in one site, but what I would rather have, is them NOT on the net at all.

Duranix added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:04 pm

Its not pretty when they contaminate another site.

As for their mobile-text “taken 5 steps further”, well..

ill leave you with a quote.

“yo u cen keep on hatn n takn ma komments down but ima jus keep puttn bck izzon cuz yall juz haterz! myspizace is da shyt n if yall cent handel it den u cen juz go 2 hel lyke all da oter myspace hatas. i gots mad myspaces n ima keeps chkn em lyke erday n ima take allyall off my frenz list so juz keeps hatn!”

Anyone who thinks that THAT is proper english is… well… Go take some English classes, then take 5 typing classes, and THEN come back, and we can see if your ready to get out of quarantine on myspace.

Oh, and ANYBODY who hates their parents because they would not let them go to the cinemas on saturday, needs to be put under close inspection. Oh, wait, I forgot. They’re emo anyway. Theyre probablly going to slit their wrists and talk about their results.

Duranix added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:08 pm

Fuck you faggot get a life

the truth added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:11 pm

when im online it doesnt bother me that people use slang or get lazy and write luv instead of love or use acronyms such as l.o.l. What does bother me is that people are unaware of when to stop using it. You would be amazed as to how many kids lack the common sense of speaking properly when speaking in a work environment, to adults or during interviews (This is me asuming that they have the ability and just choose to use sparingly if at all, as it is in my case).

my view added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:13 pm

thats not towards you myview, it was towards “the truth”

Duranix added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:13 pm

in case you missed the name you guys are taking this a little to serious!

a little too serious added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:22 pm

i agree take a step back from your keyboards and BREATHE!

jones added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:25 pm

im not gonna disagree that myspace is or at least has the potential of being a wastee of time, but why just single out myspace, theres a plethora of sites that do the same and im not just talking about networking sites, go on muchosucko.com and youll know exactly what im talking about.

an actual comment added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:31 pm

i wonder what the server will put as my name if i dont write one in. *after much consideration* Alright im going to try it!

Anonymous added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:39 pm

…I am really impressed with your lack of typing skills. No, I really am. Mis-spelling words that aren’t even commonly shortened when online? That is really impressive. Almost as impressive as how you prove one of the points of this article so strongly.

This Space Intentionally Left Blank added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:40 pm

…Sorry, I neglected to thank mindful observer for showing deliberate hypocrisy and blatant ignorance.

This Space Intentionally Left Blank added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:42 pm

oh, your welcome!

mindful observer added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:44 pm

I found this quite interesting, actually…then again, while it was all previously known (98% of people on myspace are twats, i have a feeling i may have underestimated) i still found my pathetically bored mind drawn to it in between reading purely pathetic time-wasting bulletins on mine own myspace.
Dear god, please kill me before myspace eats the rest of my soul or anyone else’s.
Or, maybe, kill Tom…

susanna added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:45 pm

its funny how you so called “intelectually superior people” take an article written by a man who goes by the name of “moneydick” so seriously.

irony at its best added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:49 pm

Hey susanna i have a myspace too! But im in the top 2 percentile thats not a twat just like you!

still typing added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:51 pm

At least it’s deliberate, which makes it worth the while to read. Unlike the other monstrosities of malformed text…

This Space Intentionally Left Blank added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 4:58 pm

I rest my case.

This Space Intentionally Left Blank added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:00 pm

never mind, i just read the above thread

another view added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:01 pm

just cuz u guys werent able to get a date on myspace dats y!

haterz suck added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:05 pm

if haters wanna hate den it der loss!

haterz suck added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:06 pm

dont really have much of an opinion just seemed like too many of the same people kept making new posts.

new comment added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:09 pm

Pretty self-explanatory.

It's mainly because the replies are so amusing! added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:11 pm

i agree with the article myspace is not only all of the above mentioned but is a disgrace to all christians. The inflamatory remarks, less than respectful refernces to women and sexuality, and the aforementioned risque pictures disgust me. That is why I am now part of mypraise.com

fuck myspace added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:17 pm

^^^^

lets stay on topic added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:22 pm

Well, I imagine the problem (or at least a small part of it)is that parents do not have either the time or the desire to pay attention to their kids, so the aforementioned kids become desperate for attention, even to the point of prostituting themselves for it. The infamous friend counter on Myspace becomes a quasi-empirical measure of attention to them.

No you don't... added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:23 pm

Please spare everybody the fury of the self-righteous.

Don't get me started on your 'cult' crap... added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:24 pm

as both a prostitute and a myspace user I would have to say the difference is overwhelming “No you don’t…”

very bad analogy!

no added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:27 pm

i agree with the religious wing, i think lack of religious faith and morals has ultimately lead to the decline of humanity, youth especially, and ultimately has lead to sites such as myspace.com gaining visitors because children our mislead and lost.

higher being added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:33 pm

Sorry, but I was not using it as an analogy. Just as a colloquial description, in the same manner as using ‘attention whore’ in that spot.

No you don't... added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:35 pm

i can blame whoever the fuck i want for whatever the fuck i want bithce!

dont tell me what to do added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:37 pm

!

people suck added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:40 pm

I think I shall blame those who employ the poor grammar. Grammer can’t be poor, he’s got plenty of money from Frasier.

Oh, that's just wonderful... added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:42 pm

i love hos

i love bad grammer

but hos and bad grammer in one suck!

myno added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:43 pm

^lol^

ur man paul added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:44 pm

myspace doesnt make people dumber
people make people dumber!

truth added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:47 pm

i love how half of you guys who hate myspace admit to using the site anyways! you cant have your cake and eat it too!

Anonymous added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:50 pm

cake is also a terrific lubricant “truth”

sex all day added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:53 pm

I enjoy myspace I have found many people that I would have never found. I have one question. The title of your project…

A Scientific Approach to Myspace’s Failure

.. If it is indeed a scientific project…WHat is your independant variable?
Thanks

Cory Mabrey added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:56 pm

I HATE YOU!

i love EVERYONE added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 5:59 pm

I agree with you in most things. I’ve sadly been lured into using MySpace but thats only because I have a way to talk to my friends online now. I’m not one of those attention seeking “suicidal” losers, nor do I even know how to “cut” myself. Your right about that, the lameasses using MySpace to get attention and/or meet people are stupid.

I only use MySpace to talk to people I go to school with and I’ve never added someone I don’t know, other than band sites.

However, I loved this article. Very true, very funny. But, I’ll be sticking with MySpace for communication purposes.

Laurell added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:01 pm

http://myspace.com/lollipopmcsmileyface

How dare you not mention the worst MySpace profile ever! added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:02 pm

so what do u guys think of gay people? stupid or disgusting?

I AGREE WITH ^ added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:03 pm

Wow… that was mature.

Laurell added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:05 pm

especially those who are attracted to people of the same gender to which they were born.

Gays suck dick!

people suck added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:08 pm

I’m not a homophobe, but I’m not really into the whole gay thing.

They could just stay away from me and I’m cool with it.

Laurell added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:10 pm

so thats what p.s means

interesing

I AGREE WITH ^ added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:11 pm

Yup, I agree with Milosh.

This whole article was a fun read though, it makes me realize how much time people have on their hands.

Laurell added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:14 pm

yall a bunsh of hatas GET A LYFE myspace is da shit n ur juz jelus cuz u dont hav no frens to tauk to so u cant go on it. myspeasy 4 lyfe! Ill do wat I want when I want n ifs dat means goin on da SPACE den dats wat ima do. SO FUK DA HATAS! G UNIT! Iv ben goin on dat cite erday , durin skool, at home, at my mans homes, on da phone, at my dads home, at my parol oficas home, n ima keeps doin it so whateva! Smoke dat bythces!

quit hatn added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:18 pm

By the same idea Milosh, if you don’t like this article, too bad, keep it to yourself. And try not to be such an ignoramus. Without dissention, odds are Myspace would suck even more, because nobody would want to improve it.

I don't... added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:21 pm

Sorry, I had to come back. Please, for Christ’s sake, go back to school and learn English. It’s people like you who totally killed MySpace to begin with.

Laurell added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:26 pm

Well, quit hatn probably won’t, seeing as she (or he) forsakes education for meaningless self-gratification…

Why must people slaughter the English language? added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:30 pm

You do have a point… It is the people that matter more, but Myspace definitely encourages the grammatically retarded.

Why must people slaughter the English language? added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:35 pm

i fuckn hate myspace

awsume article moneydick!

yeahyeah added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:40 pm

You have to start somewhere… but what Myspace represents is another facet of all those problems you’ve mentioned.

Why must people slaughter the English language? added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:42 pm

Myspace is perhaps the most iconic networking sites, with what appears to be the most stereotyped users.

Why must people slaughter the English language? added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:46 pm

I happen to agree with this entire page. Not only does Myspace promote illiteracy, but it also pushes towards a massive data base for stalkers, and a picture gallery of whores.

Myspace ruins lives added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:47 pm

I would just like to point out that you use the word youth to discribe all the people on myspace, which is infact a mistake. A lot of people on myspace are adults. It’s true that most of the people on myspace are 18 or younger but not all. But other than that i can see where you are coming from. Not that i agree with you.

FreezingMormon added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:58 pm

How about everyone does what they want and there would be non of this and this guy wouldnt waste his time.. and neither would you guys reading all this. thanks.

BlAow added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 6:59 pm

First of all, great article. Second of all, I rather enjoy the satarical quality to, even though, most of the points about Myspace are true. It’s getting over-run will ill-bred spawns. You need to write more!

Pmm32183 added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 7:17 pm

Now THAT is a proposal I would suggest to clear up the problem.

Good Grief, Charlie Brown! added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 7:27 pm

Awesome article. I hate MySpace, and I like the work you have done.

Lampshade added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 7:56 pm

Wow Jeff, you really don’t get the point. It isn’t the website that is the problem, it’s the principles that allow it to stagnate. It flourishes because of a lack of DISCIPLINE among its users. Coincidentally, it sounds like you lack it as well. So quit “bitching and moaining” about us “LIBERAL CRYBABIES”, “take some responsibilities, grow a brain, and STFU!!!”

Good Grief, Charlie Brown! added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 8:59 pm

Dude….freaking awesome….you have researched well.

Liz added these pithy words on Apr 24 06 at 11:19 pm

Though I too have a Myspace account, I agree with your experiment. How are the youth of today going to acquire a quality education when they come home to endless hours of looking at, reading, and typing “wut up” and “krazy” and “kewl,” etc. I know kids who write like this on their school work.
And quite frankly, “pimpin” out your Myspace with all that “epileptic” crap is fucking pointless and annoying.
Those quizzes and “Which ____ Are You?” piss me off too.

seth added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 1:39 am

I am a Myspace member. I check my page numerous times each day. I have accepted friend invites from people I barely know because it seems to amuse them and I really don’t care how many friends I have. Of my 113 friends, I regularly converse with about 8. I read every word of this article and, while it is not likely to change my Myspace habits, I agree with every single word. Well put, sir.

Leslie added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 5:48 am

hi :P i just thought this was funny. it was also surprisingly true! haha!

krissy added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 6:59 am

Absolutely brilliant! Sadly my smiles where tainted with the inward nodding of agreement. Keep up the good works!

Mousedrover added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 10:15 am

Yes, I found the “article’ illuminating, however, isn’t myspace.com just a mirror of our culture? What do we expect, don’t we think that the lexicon used in myspace is in fact the idiom’s used on the street, schools, clubs and so forth? Do we expect anything different from the internet? Youth culture is about the gloss and speed in which products and friends are consumed for there immediate gratification and narcism. Social networks are not about the social good, there social and therefore are going to be inundated with a type of politic that describes, inherits and sustains a type of entertainment and language used in our cultural capital. What did you expect? ‘Cultural Good’ this has no foundation, you’re looking at pop-culture. Your lament sounds like you’re coming from a puritanical right side that dreams for a past where manners where a virtue, I’m sorry but we don’t care about this and we shouldn’t. It’s illuminating to me that you would expect something different? Utopia failed with modernism, sorry to inform you of this.

If you look outside, it’s all around you, it’s just now you can one-stop-shop for all your cursory culture needs.

To finish though, it was an entertaining read and the ’statisics’ were quite humorous. It could be worrth it to track it daily as in a daily language count.

Pantone021c added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 11:41 am

You commentary on myspace.com made me laugh, it made me think, and it made me cry. I noticed that you feel that one of, if not the best use for myspace is for bands. That being said, you should check out the fine print on myspace. As you said, Tom (I think) sold myspace to whats-his-face from Fox. It says somewhere that anything put on myspace instantly becomes the legal property of its owners. That includes poetry, music, or whatever. So, if some no-name garage band puts their first hit on myspace and then makes it big, myspace owns the legal rights to that song. Just thought you, and anyone with a band on myspace, should know.

Dan added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 3:15 pm

I think I love you. Please tell me where to send flowers.

Meredith added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 5:28 pm

“its funny how with all the problems the world faces, all the hate groups like kkk, all the cults the world has, all the oppresive governments that rule the world, etc‚Ķ we pick a fight with myspace.”

Blah, agreed.

Laurell added these pithy words on Apr 25 06 at 9:27 pm

I thought this piece (first I’ve ever read from this site, and shared from a friend on myspace) was about social commentary, not science. “Research” was done, and numbers crunched, but no, it wasn’t science and was REALLY funny. Funny in that sad, but true sort of way.
Regardless of who and what the author chose to use as search criteria is as important as the issues he/she is trying to illustrate. To be more clear: the author is not picking on bad spellers, rather, moneydick is talking about the degredation of our language, something some of actually care about becuase if the language I love and am proud to use is devalued then in some way my culture is devalued too. It’s also ironic that goths were used as an example, since, as another reader posted, goths like the idea of being different, non-conformist, and un-labeled, but they herd together in a place that is fully of 21st-century , pop-culture of America… the place where labels and stereotypes and conformity reign.
The article is hilarious and shocking. Comments have said that it was a waste of time and asked you not to bash things that others do with their time… Hipocrites?
Thanks for the COMMENTARY!

Alex added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 2:29 am

Great post – very amusing. Myspace is definitely an intriguing social phenomenon. Like all tools, it can be used well, or – not. The majority of users do not use it for any productive purpose.

Regarding internet acronyms, misspellings, and other widely-used and accepted massacres of the english language: I notice an interesting parallel here between our current e-language and George Orwell’s Newspeak of 1984 fame. If you’ll recall, Big Brother minimized the number and type of words in citizen’s lexicons. Since the concepts you can articulate/understand/formulate are defined by the language which you use to do so, all thought which Big Brother deemed unacceptable was made impossible.

Don’t think me alarmist, but I think much the same thing is going on today, especially with regards to people of my own generation (albeit on a less intentionally and globally engineered scale). If all you can or want to say is summed up in handy little acronyms (omg, wtf?), there’s very little room for original thought. Because myspace is so easy to take at face-value, with nothing to question other than whether these pics are hott, users can get used to approaching their whole life that way – and I think that is a serious mistake.

Serena added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 6:50 am

I just love you, I love you so very much.

Travis added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 11:33 am

Well, I have to say that I agree with your article- myspace does dominate too many peoples live’s. And yes, it does waste time. But who the hell would right a whole article about it? No offense, I mean I did take the time to read this article. But come on dude, get a life. =)

Cutie added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 2:21 pm

this is so true. muahaha. and i hate myspace because of it. yet i still have one so my friends will shut up about me getting one. :] this is like… the best article i’ve ever read. freaking genius. :D

cancan added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 5:29 pm

Even though I do have a myspace profile, I still get very annoyed by many of the users on there. Especially those who feel the need to post all these naked or almost naked pics of themselves. That and the horrible layouts. You can preview your page on there so I don’t know why people still have these backgrounds that prevent you from reading anything on the page!

Anyway, good article!

Kim added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 7:02 pm

Deleting my Myspace account a few months ago was such a relief. You can’t even be remotely female without getting solicitations for sex every day. And no, I was not a “Myspace Whore” (Girl who posts practically naked photo to collect as many male “friends” as possible.) My avatar was an ugly green monster. Still, these loser dudes wouldn’t leave me alone.
Now I’m myspace free and it is bliss. I don’t want to be associated with the type of people who are the majority on Myspace.

Kate added these pithy words on Apr 26 06 at 9:55 pm

“I hope this page will give people who can‚Äôt put their hatred of Myspace into words something to send to their friends.”

I thought of that when I started reading.

some guy added these pithy words on Apr 27 06 at 1:21 am

All your article is really saying is “people on Myspace are pretty much the same as on the rest of the Internet”. Whoop-de-friggin’ doo. Nothing mentioned in the article seems any more or less idiotic than the rest of the internet as a whole.

For that matter, your analysis was hardly scientific.

SoulSkorpion added these pithy words on Apr 27 06 at 7:30 pm

I guess I never realized there were so many stupid people using myspace, I am only 22 and I feel like I have a terrible case of agism… If you don’t have a life offline, then don’t present it online… but I for one agree, “finding like minded people” has never been easier for my band, and it has helped immensly…
haha
maybe tom will someday start a civil myspace war..?
what side will you pick, oh wise scientist… :)

I use the smiley face because it is the only way to show I am joking, but seriously..?

to myspace, or not to myspace… that is the question :)

peace

Huckleberry Jim added these pithy words on Apr 27 06 at 10:29 pm

“Aren‚Äôt they a species of Tasmanian flightless bird?”

Look, I apologise. I don’t know where else to vent. Emu is pronounced E-myou, not E-moo. Thus, it has no verbal correlation with ‘emo’. It also has quite a wide Australian distribution, rather than being just Tasmanian.

Er. Also: Good article. I’m not quite brave enough to actually go to MySpace, though. I mostly like my sanity, so I’ll have to trust your ‘findings’.

S. Alexandra added these pithy words on Apr 28 06 at 12:49 am

I hate myspace.

Genni added these pithy words on Apr 29 06 at 8:34 pm

I honestly do not know where to begin. I opened a myspace account a month or so ago just to check it out. Since then, I have decorated my page, blogged, etc. But mostly and more importantly, I have contacted several friends who I had deemed as “long-lost”. Now we are in contact, and if I would like to tell a lot of people about an event all I have to do is post a bulletin. Now, I’m just an average 26 year old male in Nebraska. I don’t consider myself “emo” or “goth” or anything else so specific, though I may have some of the so-called traits or listen to the same music. A question I have is this: If a band getting their name out on myspace doesn’t offend you, why would someone writing poetry? That person is expressing themselves just in a different way. And to be sure, lyrics to a song and poetry definitely go to the same family picnic if you catch my drift. What if I wrote a blog that included the line: ‘Sometimes I feel like I hate my dad.’ Because sometimes at the moment I do feel like that. The end result of the blog might be that of course, I do not hate my dad. But your “scientific” research seems to imply that I do. I have misspelled words on my blogs before. Sometimes out of fun, sometimes because of a typing accident. Oh, by the way, I found a typo on your page. Wanna know what it is? Not telling, you illiterate moron. You started out to prove why myspace sucks. Therein lies the problem. A real scientific study would have been objective, and I would imagine that there wouldn’t be obscene language in the results. Besides, I don’t care for All My Children. And you know what? I watch something else instead.

Brian

P.S.- Monkeydick? Both scientific and classy.

Brian added these pithy words on Apr 30 06 at 6:52 am

*shrug* I think the people who rail agianst illeteracy are picking out the posts which consist almost entirely of horribly spelled words, which might actually be jokes in and of themselves.

Good Grief, Charlie Brown! added these pithy words on Apr 30 06 at 3:50 pm

You think Myspace is bad? Try going to the anonymous internet-confession board, http://www.grouphug.us! Do a search for the term ‘cutting’ and you will find an endless holocaust of 13-year-old girls on the verge of ending it all with razor-blades, because they’re the first person in the history of the world who’s ever lost a boyfriend- but don’t try to tell them they’re “Just doing it for the attention”, because they’re not!!!

Hans, the Leper added these pithy words on May 02 06 at 5:59 pm

blah blah myspace rulez blah blah blah my gf and i liek whoa blah blah artic monkeys blah blah indie rock blah like uber blah

dirt. added these pithy words on May 04 06 at 9:43 pm

lol

add me on

http://www.myspace.com/T666

:p

d
d

T
6
6
6

davidd added these pithy words on May 06 06 at 3:31 am

First of all, myspace is for ENTERTAINMENT. Not scientific research, not education, not curing all the social ills that you bitch about. So if it doesn’t entertain you and you hate it that much, DON’T USE IT.

Spelling and Literacy: The Language Factor

If a person can get thier point across by using an acronym or common-phrase, THEN WHO GIVES A FUCK. LOL Obviously you do. If a person chooses to use an unconventional pattern, (HoWeVeR gRaMmAtIcAlLy InCoRrEcT iT mAy Be) to create some kind of differentness, THEN WHO GIVES A FUCK. Obviously you do. Oh, and just to clue you in on a little fact, not everyone in this world is a mental giant like you. Not everyone has the ability or opportunity to go to “Vasser College” and get a Bachelors Degree in…. whatever it is that you do. Some of us just don’t fill the overwhelming urge to type a thousand word college level thesis when posting a blog or messaging a friend. get over it.

Filled with Goths? Sorta.

Yea, let’s take this poor fashion train wreck, (who’s trying to identify with something other than us) and point out how fuckin’ stupid he looks. Let’s all point and laugh….HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Fuck anyone who doesn’t look or act like us, right? RIGHT?

Cookie Cutter Phrases? Grade for originallity: D-

Sniff Sniff. Do I smell a hint of jelousy? Yes jelousy, because of the fact that you can’t come up with something worth reapeating, (let alone repeating enough times to warrant some lame ass artical). HOORAY to Dave Cheppelle for giving us “I’m Rick James Bitch!” RIGHT ON to Mr. T for giving us “I pity tha fool” THANK YOU Wendy’s for giving us “Where’s the Beef!?” and FUCK YOU for chastising them.

Myspace on Suicide Watch?

So your oversized cranium can’t find a reason why the word “razorblade” would show up on myspace? here’s one. It’s a word in the english language and people use it. suicide is real. Let’s just forget that some of those 47,300 hits were actual cries for help.

The War of Good and Evil
Yeah… noooobody is taking you seriously on this one buddie.

OMG I hate my parents! Elder Angst Central

I’m glad for you. I’m glad that your parents are perfect. I’m glad that they’ve never beaten or raped you. I’m glad that they’ve never humilliated you or put you in harms way. Most of these kids are winny little brats bitching cause they didn’t get a shiny new car for thier sixteenth birthyday. But did you ever stop to think that maybe at least some of these kids are right for hating thier parents when they are really neglected or molested. why don’t you figure out which ones are which and write an artical about that? O right, I forgot. You only have time to write a paragraph on this subject.

Ads from the Seventh Circle of Hades

As much as we ALL hate advertisements, they HAVE fueled every media market from radio to internet since radio was invented. Anybody retarded enough to believe they will get something for free by clicking on a banner is doomed to live a meaningless life, and should be eaten by bears. Everybody else just ignores them, except you. Those mind numbing ads that you dispize so much makes myspace free for all of us.

BANDS. The Saving Grace

Gee, you found something you like about myspace. Good for you. WHOOPTY-FUCKIN-DOO.

Conclusion

You’re an Asshole. So why don’t you go back to the think tank with all your other Steven Hawkins wannabe buttbuddies and do something more productive with your time then mentally jerk each other off. O wait, I forgot. That’s all you know how to do. And while you’re at it, do us all a favor and delete that underwear stain you call a profile or grow some imagination. It’s pathetic.

YOURS TRUELY added these pithy words on May 07 06 at 9:03 pm

I agree about many of the points you have for and against myspace. It is in people’s innate nature to self-express to be noticed and to network. This is such a fascinating phenomena that myself, a lawyer, and an anthro chick are thinking of writing a (semi)serious publication into the modern day ramifications of myspace, it’s addictive qualities, and what it says about basic human nature. Any comments are welcome. I just wanted to add the caveat that as there is a ton of profiles of “crap” to say the least, if one winnows the grain from the chaff, you meet some pretty interesting people. And I’ve had the opportunity to keep in touch with friends from high school, college, medical school, club promotion, etc. I try to keep the bullshit factor as low as possible. And I’ve heard alot of great new music too. That’s my two cents

Hans added these pithy words on May 08 06 at 11:34 am

Nicely done, very nicely done. I was going to respond to another comment I saw, but it took me so long to add 0 and 7 that I forgot what I was going to say.

But I digress. I have a myspace profile, and so does my band. Mine is completely and entirely useless, but the band’s has actually given us a bit more attention then we would have had otherwise.

Yeah, I’ve talked to a few people that I thought I’d never see again, but we sent two, maybe three messages before forgetting each other again.

I do use both “lol” and “WTF”, simply because I can. It doesn’t make me an idiot, or uneducated. Well… I mean… I am both… but that’s not why I use abbreviations… acronyms… whatever.

Regardless, My name is Frank Coleman, and I both approve this article, and shamelessly plug my band.

Myspace.com/Mordos_Kull
Myspace.com/newamericanstandard

Franky added these pithy words on May 09 06 at 7:51 am

Okay,

First off, why criticize people because of what they do? You are only a critic because you have picked something to hate on solely because you have NOTHING else to do. I, for one, am an avid Myspace.com user. I enjoy what it has to offer, though at times, I hate some of the dumb shit that it comes with. However, you have hatred just because you haven’t taken the time to explore it to its fullest potential and have decided to badmouth anyone involved with it. So does that make you right? No. It just means you’ve voiced your opinion. So go sit in the corner with the other 5 people who hate Myspace and figure out something new to be angry at.

Dumbass.

i HATE you added these pithy words on May 12 06 at 9:49 am

dude myspace is the shit. your just a pussy

bob added these pithy words on May 12 06 at 5:50 pm

I hope that you know that by searching for the words “goth” and “punk” and any other words such as those that you were only going to get posers. It is the internet and anyone can say that they are goth, it doesn’t make it true.

like I'm telling you my name. added these pithy words on May 14 06 at 11:55 am

I see creativity in the way people market themselves on myspace. I have better-than-average friends?

The world’s full of idiots, on myspace and elsewhere, and when people say “alot” it bothers me a lot too.

LauraMarie added these pithy words on May 15 06 at 10:11 am

So your language was not professional, which is part of what you targeted on myspace. Which also makes it hard to take you seriously. Also any computer geek knows about metatags and how they work and can use that to manipulate data by adding quotes and dropping words. Using a plus sign or too. Also you percentages are extremely low. 47,000 out of a couple million…nothing to worry about. maybe one of those suicidal kids will have someone reach out and try to help them, maybe even save there life. sorry you hate myspace

Look_whos_talking added these pithy words on May 15 06 at 10:17 pm

So I know that MySpace can be used for evil, however when used by an adult who knows what information should be put online, it can be great. I have found many old and dear friends, who without MySpace, I never would have been able to locate. This is what MySpace is for. Why let all the little kids ruin it for the rest of us? Isn’t it their parents fault for giving them access to the internet without teaching them the dangers associated with using it?

this chick added these pithy words on May 16 06 at 9:58 am

I’m Rick James, bitch!

Rick James added these pithy words on May 17 06 at 8:16 am

ADDENDUM (which was missed out due to HTML code):

above you see a smiley, part of the new Interweb culture. Learn it, or be left behind. Language evolves; evolve with it.

Joe added these pithy words on May 19 06 at 2:10 am

You hit the nail right on the proverbial head..save for maybe one other additional positive. They do have good networking opps if you can weed through the Spam. I belong to a couple business oriented groups and musician groups, and have touched base with some pretty good people. Of course said good people have an IQ over 80. They are also over the age of 25. Go figure.

Just another Myspace hater added these pithy words on May 22 06 at 6:07 am

you fuckers, I just typed 1000 words of quality discussion regarding comments on this site and my own experiences with the myspace world as a technology teacher in a high school. However, because you chose to pretend to be clever with your posting requirements, I lost the entire content of my thoughts when submitting because of ill-explained submittal directions in the subject line. It’s ok to be a cynic, to be a misanthrope, or whatever …however, if you would like an intelligent discourse then you should not impede it with childish stumbling blocks such as this.-p

Anonymous added these pithy words on May 25 06 at 9:06 pm

and we love every minute of it

The Enemy added these pithy words on May 29 06 at 4:41 pm

FUCKING I.E. I HATE I.E AND MYSPACE AAAHHHH *Speeds off*

Sonic added these pithy words on May 30 06 at 5:57 pm

Thanks for the article. I agree!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous added these pithy words on Jun 05 06 at 12:17 pm

omgad wut da fefuck!!1!!#@~ u mekkin fun of myspecc!@!^@~ u den understnd me imma killa meself cz ur so fkin meenn!@^#^~~~

… =D I love this article. It`s so true I think my liver is bleeding. The pathetic part is by the time half the idiots on myspace have digested this, Operation Take-Over-Myspace-With-Pink-Plastic-Razors will already have taken place. The “goths” are already flying the coop and the emos are moving in. Oh my.
The term “I`m so goth I shit bats” is now being replaced by “i so Em0 i e@t raz0rzzz!21^%!@%^~”
It`s a tragic fact that the population of myspace is a hideous monster that changes and mutates with each passing of the day. Every time you think it`s defeated it returns with an even worse intellectual eyesore to blind your mind`s vision.
Good news; some people really do know how to use myspace as a social tool…not as a weapon of mass destruction.

Good job. =]

Katie added these pithy words on Jun 10 06 at 10:06 am

I understand everything you’ve written and can appreciate it’s meaning. However I personally find no use for your statistics at all. MySpace has been useful for people like myself in keeping contact with various people in my life that I don’t necessarily have the time to call or write in depth letters too. It’s also aided in finding those i’ve lost contact with. I can locate many local bands and find bands in areas that I plan on visiting. While it may have many faults it does have it’s perks as well. The ignorance displayed throughout the myspace community can either be overlooked by users or a former user such as yourself. On a realistic level though, with the good comes the bad. The internet itself endorses horrible grammer and spelling. Along with the lazy people who choose not to learn the correct uses. I’ve yet to finish reading so i’ll continue of course. It may fail and when/if it does it will have spawned many more ideas just like it. What can you do really?

Angela added these pithy words on Jun 15 06 at 5:30 pm

this article is realy grate..

terian added these pithy words on Jun 18 06 at 6:38 pm

Have you looked at all at any of the pages which could potentially be whole-hearted character in url and html form? There are a lot of pages which do not contain such nonsense- I’m sure more often than not, this is the case.
Rest assured, mine is wizard: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=24669540
You have to take into account the different lifestyles people tend to live. Some are definitely full-fledged goth, and although I do not support the gothiness of the 80’s and 90’s kids, most aren’t readily willing to change. Some do want to kill themselves, some are Rick James, bitch. Blagh.

Kate added these pithy words on Jun 20 06 at 4:47 pm

Today I have made a personal record..I have already read all 339 comments and opinions in the last 6 hours.The discussion is quite nice.From my part,I would say Myspace make you dumb headed.If you would like to kill your time read stories,articles movie reviews whatever.There is no point in killing time of others sharing some lame thoughts.

I am Sham added these pithy words on Jun 22 06 at 3:46 am

“there are people who hate MySpace with every molecule of their being.”

Yes… yes you’ve hit the nail on the head. I absolutly dispise myspace and the culture that goes along with it. As you said in the article it is a great IDEA, but when implemented it’s turned into something(as you proved) worthy of the top 5 stupidest things humanity has ever done.

Destroyer added these pithy words on Jun 30 06 at 8:07 am

“…..illegible flashing abortions.”

Assume you mean the ‘relevant and highly targeted ads’?

Easy enough to throw a monkey wrench. Just use an ad blocker (most are free)–stopzilla (not free), squsi (free) or AdBlock (free). Whirling adervishes begone. Create a blankspace in myspace.

OMFG,WTF,ROTFLMAO etc.

pratik added these pithy words on Jul 04 06 at 12:10 pm

u guys spend way too much time in ur childerns lives…. stop with all the google.com shit ….i thought being on myspace.com was bad enough now look at u guys u analize it FUCK!!!!! i wish i could shit bats so then i could be goth a slit my wrists …..give ur children some space no wonder they hate u….do u still change there underwear for them? i wish i could have a loving overreacting bunch like u on myspace so i could spam the shit outta you ….do u feel stupid yet? IM going to cry.. for that im taking u off my top 8…..:P
much love

petra added these pithy words on Jul 17 06 at 7:26 am

Well, you certainly entertained me lol =]

Although, the paragraph about goths was a little un-cool.
Each to his/her own, I say.

Mazz.

Mazoozal Provis added these pithy words on Aug 01 06 at 6:33 am

also, good job with the scientific shit! youve officially reached the level of a wily advertiser. your a fucking idiot!!!

ray added these pithy words on Aug 12 06 at 1:08 am

I believe this little project was done with little point but to entertain and inform those who lack the knowledge and knowhow of how to differentiate between real and fake, between simple, conservative, & to the point and clusterf***ed, overwhelming, and extremely vague…and if you were to go into the topic of people trying to be a “bada$$ on the keyboard” and start fights online, this could’ve potentially been over twice as long…but in that, there are so many different views and stands on each, that it would take entirely too much time and effort to compile statistics of that nature. But overall, I think this personal expedition was rather informative, and anyone who is absolutely in love and addicted to myspace, i.e. those who become “myspace wh**es”, the ones with ten million friends, oughta read deep, long, and hard into this page, and realize that it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

Wubb added these pithy words on Aug 14 06 at 6:49 pm

Per chance have you read the “NewScientist” article concerning privacy and MySpace?

Minuteman added these pithy words on Aug 17 06 at 4:57 am

“351
Samick Says:
August 12th, 2006 at 9:09 pm

I think Myspace is good for the people even if it’s full of crap.

If it can help out a children to write on myspace :
‚ÄúI hate my mother‚Äù, well, I think it‚Äôs good then.”

If it can help out a children.
If it can help out a children.
If it can help out a children.

Learn to spell, and maybe someone might take your opinion seriously.

Anonymous added these pithy words on Sep 02 06 at 5:56 pm

great post (my highlight i’m afraid being ‘i’m so goth i shit bats’)
i’ve posted about myspace a few times on my own blog and have a real love-hate relationship with it. there are enough saving graces for me to want to use it but my single biggest problem with it – OMG’s and goths and tits and glittertext aside – is the fact that it really doesn’t actually work very well. it’s clunky and buggy and can take half an hour just to log into sometimes. i just pray for the day that someone like google or blogger buys it and strips the fucking guts out of it….

marilyn's shampoo added these pithy words on Sep 05 06 at 8:38 am

i hope you’ll apreciate the joke in this but i’ve linked this post with your banner (top left a la make poverty history etc..) on my myspace

if you have a major objection let me know & i’ll take it down but it’s an affectionate ‘homage’!!

xxsxx

marilyn's shampoo added these pithy words on Sep 05 06 at 9:31 am

Ha!
It’s amusing that someone has posted an animated gif
of a dancing llama on your myFace page, as if to reinforce your ‘cookie cutter phrases’ point.

rapscallion added these pithy words on Oct 29 06 at 10:58 pm

i agree with everything said in this article, and i look forward to the day 10 years from now when everyone else clues in.

jessied added these pithy words on Nov 30 06 at 5:23 pm

You’ve done a great service to humanity, here. I wish everybody with a Myspace would read this.

I hate Myspace. It seems everybody at my school has one. Luckily, I’m not friends with these people. My friends, who don’t go to my school, don’t have Myspaces. None of them.

I’m writing a 5-10 page paper about how the Web has impacted culture, and my biggest rambling will be about Myspace.

Rakesh Patel added these pithy words on Jan 31 07 at 4:20 pm

Hi%2C+all.+Nice+site…I+really+like+your+site+%21+Good+job+man.

Smith added these pithy words on Feb 28 07 at 8:53 am

I totally agree. While I have a MySpace, it’s really meant more for satirical purposes than anything. I even constantly berate people for abbreviating the English language to an indecipherable mess. Even the url on my MySpace is http://www.myspace.com/myspacesucks2007. As a teenager, I have to deal with the idiots you’re complaining about here everyday at school. I’m sure that one day, they’ll look back on their high school years with a kind of shame I can only imagine, but, for now, all I can see is the downfall of our society in the future. Good to see that I’m not the only one.

Chris added these pithy words on Apr 09 07 at 6:20 pm

You’ve actually put into words exactly what I think of MySpace.com. This is exactly why I don’t go there anymore. Hoping against hope this doesn’t happen to Stumbleupon.com.

Fran Carasone added these pithy words on Jul 12 07 at 2:02 pm

My God, I had no idea. I just made a MySpace account to play Slutris and now I have dain bramage. Damn you, MTV! I hate you, Dad!

Tim added these pithy words on Oct 12 07 at 3:12 pm

I completely agree with you. In the time i spent on myspace (it was very brief, couldn’t handle the attention whores and constant complaining about how crap life is from emos) this is practically exactly what i saw or got the impression of

Xeno added these pithy words on Dec 13 07 at 9:14 am

Hello all. I’ve just found this place and I’m making my first post.

llamafruit added these pithy words on May 18 08 at 11:19 pm

Wow! I loved the article. Bands are the only reason why myspace is successful. A true example of why the “no child left behind” is every American child level behind.
We suck and we need to kick out the Democrat/Republican feel goods out of office and restore America to the giant they belong. Spell check is free!

Ryan added these pithy words on Jun 01 08 at 1:59 am

these comments make me chuckle

Daniel added these pithy words on Aug 20 08 at 12:52 pm