Moneydick: entry

I am finding it hard to handle my own shit because I like to help others. They need my help so bad that if they dont recieve it they will die. (this is not a joke) I have this homie that is real close and he has been lying to me. He used to be a hardcore drug (real ones) addict (this means hourly sometime every 5 min for months even years). He told me he stopped and he did way back almost 1 year ago. He got sick one morning and I sent him to the hospitol. The doctor told him he would have died if he did not come. He had real internal problems not just some flu virus. I then later caught him doing bigtimer drugs again. He is going to Die in 3 years if he does not quit soon. I take care of him financially and phisically. He is in his mid twenties and I am slightly younger. His parents will not do anything for him except for throwing him in rehab. If he goes to rehab he will probably not be able to get back up off his feet. Right now he has a good job but is struggling due to the extensive use of hard drugs. I am doing everything I can to make shure my homie doesnt die from illness and does not drop off the bottom. Every time I help him with something and explain what he needs to do i get viciously yelled at for it even tho he can’t possibly do it on his own. He has done enough drugs already to damage his brain and is now functioning at about 30% (much slower and much more confused with lower attentien span). It hurts me so much to see a homie going down like this that at some time I want to quit. If I quit he will die and I must only blame myself for his death. Since I am fully responsible for a human life besides my own I understand what parents go through. It will be a difficult process but I am strong and Im gonna save this motherfuckers life. This is the exact reason I drink and I take much offence to bitches tellin me Im an Alcohaulic. So shut the fuck up or find some other way I can deal with life.
Hippocritically speaking:
Tim Jiggerit