From Mr. Hirsch: [antiwar.org]
The first nuclear bomb used in an act of war after “Little Boy” and “Fat Man” should be code-named “Demo” ‚Äì for “demonstration” that we can do it, don’t mess with us, for “democracy” on the rise in the Middle East, and for the “Democrats” in Congress who will go along with the program. As with Hiroshima and Nagasaki, we will be told it saved lives, ours and theirs. You know the script.
In other news, Snoop Dogg stars in an LA Riot (1992) Spoof film. For a trailer, click here.
I thought something like this would come out sooner. Waiting 14 years to laugh about something seems a little extreme. I’m sure some homies got blasted into wheelchairs and all that, but making the switch from pain to comedy is probably much easier seeing as ‘Friday‘ and ‘Next Friday‘ have been on repeat for the last 5 years. Thank God. In case you forgot about those, here’s a quote to refresh:
Joker: [after realizing his bedroom door is locked]
[using his date’s butt as a mouth]
Joker: No more locked doors! Gracias.
I’m sure this will be better. IT’S SNOOP FOR RIOT’S SAKE
Google Video has been filling up lately. Millions are uploading stupid videos of themselves turning into cupcakes: (30 seconds)
And some are even baking them. Then there’s the clips with a little more class:
Then there are AMAZING videos. If you’ve watched this far I congratulate you. A couple days ago I watched the 9/11 documentary to end all 9/11 documentaries. It’s called ‘Loose Change.’ It’s possible to refute much of the evidence in the film, but try to watch it with an open mind. It’s definitely no ‘Fahrenheit 9/11.’
I post this because I don’t think there will ever be a resolution to the truth, and we can never just settle on a half-truth and continue through history.
To make it easier, I pasted some goods from the bottom of the wikipedia article.
- ‚Üë “‘Loose Change’ An analysis”, by Michael B. Green, 911research.wtc7.net, retrieved March 1, 2006
- ‚Üë Pentagon Attack Errors, 9-11 Review, retrieved March 1, 2006
- ‚Üë Why the No-757 Crowd is Making an Ass out of Itself, Jo?´l van der Reijden, retrieved March 1, 2006
- ‚Üë The Pentagon attack: the “no plane” theories discredit 9/11 skepticism, oilempire.us, retrieved March 1, 2006
- ‚Üë Flight 77.info, retrieved March 29, 2006
- ‚Üë “Eyewitness Accounts Describe Jetliner Approaching Pentagon”, 911research.wtc7.net, retrieved March 1, 2006
- ‚Üë “UNLIKELY: ‘The Bumble Planes Theory'”, 9-11 Review, retrieved March 1, 2006
- ‚Üë How Did United Flight 93 Crash?, website exploring different theories of Flight 93’s crash, retrieved March 1, 2006
Just wanted to share this
Back with another limited edition release of Moneydick’s Funny Spam spectacular! This latest automagically created ‘prose-amatic.‘ message features a very gothic slant featuring blessed mothers, impending shadows of great affliction, and general confusion. Enjoy.
Subject: very crosscut impish
Message Body [shortened]:
in a sort of calm prophetic agony and I know hell die there sooner than hell overturn
which Casandra had filled with her influence and that occupied my mind sufficiently I should
We went there atthe usual hour and round the study fireside found the correspond and his young
to my poor mother Bless me Lorna battelle how you do remind me of her
The impending shadow of a great affliction and a great disgrace that had no distinct form in it yet
for I saw a faint blush in her face you would have let me find it out for myself
scheme I was shortly afterwards fitted out with a handsome purse of money and a portmanteau
demeanour He never made a suggestion but once and on that occasion I dont know what put
There is a post come in from India I observe he said after a short silence
with me unless it is to confirm what I say You know as well as I do that your cousin Gibson
I intend Dean aiken to get that done immediately it really must be done my right hand and no heart Everyone who knows you consults with you and is guided by you
Wikipedia has a great collection of this year’s April Fools jokes in jolly cyber land.
My favorites are:
They “released” a fake online dating service with a very funny tutorial to get you started.
The best comedy is in the ‘help section’ though:
What is Contextual Dating?
It‚Äôs a free date plus the added accrued value of the past decade‚Äôs worth of post-Industrial Age online marketing genius, all tied into a real-time, video-based, GPS-tracked, psychographically astute and environmentally pervasive promotional system.
7. Come again?
You see ads that might make your date better.
8. Such as?
Flowers. Music. Personal advice. E-greetings. Later on, depending on how our long-term opt-out natural-language-based monitoring system thinks things are going, personalized thank you notes, romantic getaway offers, various intimate pharmaceutical come-ons, engagement and bridal wear catalogs ‚Äì you know the drill.
2. NBC Public Service Ads
NBC ran some Public service announcements in the style of the “The More You Know” campaign, done by cast members of “The Office“, while in character. An example by Dwight Schrute:
“Black bears weigh between 2 and 500 pounds. Brown bears weigh between 300 and over a thousand pounds. Black bears run away from you. Brown bears run at you. When attacked by a bear, simply lie still on the ground and cover your face and head with your hands. When the bear’s finished batting you around and mauling you, contact the U.S. Forest Service.” [video here]
More of these PSAs are posted on NBC’s web site.
A remarkable new animal was discovered in Viet Nam recently by Dr. Alexander McKenzie, a biologist at the Woody Hole Terragraphic Institute. The small mammal seems to be able to consume most kinds of organic matter, and somehow combines it with carbon dioxide from the air, to produce fecal pellets of limestone. Dr. McKenzie thinks that perhaps by ranching these animals in large numbers, enough CO2 could be absorbed to have a meaningful effect on global warming. Dr. McKenzie is now searching for more of the animals having inadvertantly consumed the only one he’s found so far.
On the extensive Wikipedia collection, there’s also a list of events on April 1st that were incorrectly assumed to be pranks.